I was in a vacation mood after the long vacation which I took for Diwali.Coming back to office made me little slow in doing my work.

I was getting too many chats on Monday asking about the vacation.It was then I remembered that one of my office friends didn’t bother to talk or chat with me.

I didn’t care that cold attitude as I got in track with my work but back of my mind it was still bothering me.

Last evening I sent her a chat but her replies were very cold and I was sure there was something fishy.

I kept an offline alert for her in the Sametime Connect and waited.The moment she became offline,I went to the restroom.In another 30 seconds she also came in.It was obvious from her face that she was uncomfortable.

I asked her very straight what the problem is.She shook her shoulder in the typical Indian style to say NO and got out.I pulled her inside and asked once more.This time she replied.

The reason for the frowned face was that I didn’t reply to her on the day I was leaving home.I told her that I never got a chat from her.It was then I realized the culprit is the networks.I disconnect VPN very often but the chat engine will show me as available for another two minutes more.The person who sends me a chat thinks that I am not replying when truly I have not got the ping.

Certain people are like this.They live with many prejudices and they conclude matters according to them.Even I was having such a mentality years back which made an expensive loss as I lost a bunch of friends just because of mere misunderstanding.It was Dad who taught me to keep up friendships.I used to make girlish complaints to him saying “Oh,she didn’t pick up my call or she didn’t bother to reply me” etc.His replies would be always the same.”Why don’t you call up and see what the matter is?”

Most of the times,the reason for a fight or misunderstanding would be something silly and baseless.But people got too much of ego that they love to be in their stand than finding out what the issue is.

Once when one of my friends complained about her husband hiding something from her.I told her to ask him straight.But she didn’t.You know what he was hiding from her??He had bought a platinum chain for her birthday.He was planning to surprise her by gifting it at 12am.Since he was not comfortable keeping secrets from her,he had to act little weird to keep up the surprise. 🙂

So next time you smell something fishy in a relationship,go straight to them and talk.Sort it out.We lose friendships mainly because of our ego and misunderstandings.


24 thoughts on “Conclusions

  1. Talking directly to the person is better option over hovering misunderstanding that might disturb your peace.Sometimes chatting leads to such miscommunication problems .Its better to clear everything in relationships.

  2. Being a straight forward to a friend also cause problems… i was being truthful to my friend but she misunderstood me n finally v got separated. That pain is still there… So act according to ppl n their mentality..

    1. Hey! Even I had similar experience. Oh man, it was awful. Seriousli, it depends on d person.
      And i also think if u hav to put special efforts to sustain rel, go for the magic word – ‘AVOID’

  3. I guess behavior should vary person-wise. Ofcourse, you shouldnt be ‘fake’ but the straight-forwardness should depend upon hw good the frndshp is n hw well a person cn take the words being said.

  4. This is one of the gurly things you know. Even we use Sametime Connect at office and we do experience such issues with VPN networks. But to be frank, even if we miss to reply, guys don’t take it personally. Being frank and outspoken atleast to people who are trustworthy is a good thing to follow.


  5. Hmm…nice thought to sum up the article. 🙂
    But on a lighter tone I always thought jumping to conclusions was a good form of exercise. That is my own personal fitness mantra 😛

  6. Very true, many relations have broken due to ego, misunderstanding which could have been simply eased out if the person involved just opened up and talked to each other. Good that you made that attempt and saved a sinking relationship 🙂

  7. I have been in similar situations tons of time. Without knowing I just enter into these little imaginary fights and ill thoughts. then after some time I tell myself ” dont be insane. just leave it”. but after some times these thoughts will come again..
    Controlling mind is the most difficult thing to do.

  8. perfectly sensible post and practical observations. Some of us might be tech-savy, always online, quick to respond and all but many out there aren’t. Best to catch them offline in traditional way

  9. Very Truly said… As a matter of fact, even I believe and act as to it… but you know, sometimes there are some people who react differently when you actually go and try to talk to them even though they are at fault. still i never stand back… but in the back of the mind, that behaviour keeps its print, if the activities and behaviour following that is not normal as well… it might have been the networks fault, but it takes time to heal as its not a switch but a matter of heart.. well i have so many things to say 😛 … too large for a comment 🙂 but yeah! one thing, i do agree with you 🙂

  10. my theory – live with people who enjoy life and let you enjoy with them… stay away from people who expect silly things like your friend expected… if your friend is close to you, he/she will understand, if not then he/she does not deserve your closeness… stay away…

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