This time while writing I am having a clear picture about what I am writing.The reason is I have discussed about this matter with some of my “aunt-friends“.Even between such a busy schedule,I decided to write because I am having an intuition that now a visible trend has started.
Though I disliked “Kabhi Alvida Na Kehna“,now when I see from a different angle,after having some talks with senior women, I think the topic is correct in some sense.
The very thought about such a controversial topic came into my mind after hearing the wedding of Shashi Tharoor in the presence of his kids.
Then I was thinking,how those kids must have handled the fact the their Dad is having a girl friend and he is going to marry her.
Even though I write and support for the rights for woman and for love marriages,I have never thought about some thing like “Dad with his girl or Mom going out with her guy”.
Coming back to the details of the discussion I had with some of my very close teachers and senior female friends,what I understood was that 90% of them preferred to be out of the wedding.But they are NOT doing it just because they are scared of the society.
Deep from my heart,I don’t know whether to support them or not.When I heard their stories,it was right from their part.Most of the talks fell into these two categories.
"I remember falling on my Dad's feet for not getting married to my husband. We have a daughter born out of a rape;first and last intercourse. He is not leaving me because my father is his mentor. His life will end if he dumps me. Even after being with him for 20 years, I have never liked him or disliked him. Life is moreover like a hostel life. I am living for my daughter because she may not get a good proposal if my husband and I are separated."
I am wondering how come she lived all these years in suffocation.After hearing this,I understood why she used to spend most of the time in her work place and weekends with our friends gang.
"I don't dislike my husband but secretly being in a relationship/friendship with my boyfriend who is still single constrains me from loving him. Moreover our wedding was an adjustment between our families as he had a Christian girl friend who is still his girl friend and I was also in a relationship.As both the families wanted to get rid of our love life, they made us marry.We don't have kids. He is living his life and I am living my life.At times,I used to think why I am wasting my life."
When I see it from their eyes,they are correct.But I am still confused.
I don’t know about this issue from a man’s point of view as I am not comfortable talking about these with senior guys.
Going out-of-wedlock is not a new thing in our country.But we have heard about it only among celebrities and film stars.But about one thing I am sure,that the time for us to update two father’s/mother’s name in FB is not that far.
But,one last question.
Why are we against it?(Personally I’m against it)
They can’t because they are PARENTS??????????