Sometimes my Mom tells me,it is better that we meet some bad people in the beginning of our lives;so that later we are aware of those smiling devils.
After a span of four years I thought about the downfall times of my life when I saw my kiddo friend Nikhil’s Facebook status,which read like ” A True Friend Stabs You In The Front“.
As I had a lonely weekend,I watched ’3 Idiots’ before going to sleep.Though it is impossible to have filmy friendships in life,I was thinking why I have only a couple of friends from my college.College is a place where we get the friends for lifetime.But what went wrong in my life?Actually it was not my life which went wrong,it’s just that I met the wrong people in my life.
My school friends are still with me for more than a decade.But I am glad that the handpicked friends which I got from the college are worth than having a 100 friends.
Before coming to the college,I was not aware of lying,cheating,sweet talks and back-bitching.Back in school and at home,every relationship was transparent.If we were angry with somebody,we showed the anger.If we were upset due to somebody’s action,we always went up to that person and shouted at them.A few tears and a hug used to the solve the problems between us.Confessing and apologizing were good habits in a relationship.Due to these habits,our friendships were immortal.The fights and misunderstandings only made us feel closer to each other.
When in college,like a fool I believed everybody who talked sweetly to me.For the first time I realized that there is something called “making someone do your work”. People appreciated or encouraged others not because the latter are good at it,they just wanted to get their work done.Ignorance was considered as a sin unlike the quote ‘ignorance is a bliss‘. There was an unhealthy race among the students and people flattered each other instead of encouraging.There were situations when people talked good about a person and then curse them secretly.
Sweet talks were made to get things done.People lied looking to our eyes which I understood as truths.Egos were ample that apologizing and confessing were seen as timid actions.Taking revenges were fun as if they had trainings on it before joining the college.People broke up with their partners when they find a better pasture.People lied often and at times it was difficult to make out whether what they talked was true or not.Friendships were more of comfortable zones than relationships.
There was a time when I had a dilemma on whom to trust.The funniest part is that whomever I loved and trusted gave me the biggest blows of my life.But God was kind to give me a few souls who stood with me during the down fall time and gave me the strength to come out of the failures.During my low times,people I “loved” were eager to end me as a “failure” of the millennium.There were times when I was not even sure that I will come out of the trauma of being cheated.
Once one of “sweet” friends whom I had considered as a sibling hugged me to wish me.But instead she just whispered to me that how much she hated me after hearing about one of my achievements.Two hours before when I had announced the good news to friends,it was she who had shouted the most with joy.At that moment I felt,it would have been better if she had actually stabbed me while hugging.It would have not hurt me that bad after hearing her words.
The biggest lesson I learned from my college was not the subject which I chose but how to judge people.Today I augur well even before they show me their dirty face.
And you know what I do?I just stab them in the front and then throw them out of my life.
I feel if I had not had those bitter lessons in my college life,I would have not been assertive.I would have just stood weak wondering how to move on in life.
No wonder God tells us that everything has a purpose in life.Thank God I met them early in my life and my bunch of friends love me as if I am their soul-mate.
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Wonderful lessons learnt. Even I have a select group of handpicked friends, as you put it, and I am content having it that way. What good is a truckload of acquaintances who couldn’t care a penny about you?
That’s true..its useless having 100 friends who don’t love us..instead one friend loving and caring for us is more than enough..
It took three years for me to learn.the lessons..I’m.happy that the ignorant phase is over
Hey we need those grey shades too… Like AIRTEL goes ‘Har ek friend zaroori hai yaarrr’!
Unfortunately YES..LOL
If you pick a random person from a crowd he/she will be a victim of betrayal .
By failures only we will learn things like that how much we have been betrayed by friends we will learn to judge people. But this scenario will arise when we expect the same amount of care from our friends that we give but if we didn’t expect that then the relation will be smooth and we will not feel the betrayal stuff.This is my point of view because in this fast life you will very minute percentage of good friends. So if we feel the way then we will be left all alone in this world.
yeah its true that a lot of people may be betrayed daily
but remember our 12 std friendships?how beautiful and innocent it was..there were no expectations..we didnt cheat anybody..things were transparent those days..
Yeah you are right…….at that time we were kids to an extent
………but when we grow up we are more feared about “what others will think if we express us in this way ? or if we tell in this way?” . Because of this itself we are loosing our transparency and individuality. But we cant do anything upon this because we are living in corporate world !!!! , And in this world a person comes and talk to us then it means that he is expecting something from us or else we will be of no use. So to conclude we are living a life of others expectations!!!!
We learn something new ever day .. I have been on the recieving end a few times of the so called good friends .. but hey this is life you meet good people and you meet bad people
I came ot uk and dont have any friends here my friends are all in India and other places , we meet now and then and have a blast .. otherwsie life continues ..
yup everyday is a learning day..at least what I have learned is helping me currently..im happy about that
Thank you! thank you!! and a very nice post. very honest!
You are welcome
Thank you for that status update!!
@Narayan : I am actually against that concept of living for others..
http://heyithinkthisway.wordpress.com/2010/05/13/the-others/
I totaly agree with you. But we are in a situation to do it or to be precise we are forced to do so!!!!!
A splendid work. You were successful in expressing some of the greatest experiences of your life in a wonderful manner. You are absolutely right when you say that college teaches you how to live and back at school we were never exposed to such circumstances. Every one learns some of the greatest lesson’s of life from college. Maybe hostler’s do more than day scholar’s, i believe.
And something that i notice in you as a writer, your greatest strength is you are way frank about things and dare to open it to the world with sheer boldness. i appreciate that. Keep it up dear. Expecting more
Thanks Akhi..
Yeah its true that we will have more experiences when we are hostel than the day scholars..
But all the pain just make people stronger..that’s how we move on in life..
Keep letting me know your opinions..it matter a lot..thank you
Aren’t they nice lessons to learn? Without such lessons how boring life would be!
yup,they are “nice” lessons
A comment above was real true. Pick a random person in the crowd and he/she will have been betrayed before.But these betrayals make those few trustworthy people get closer to our hearts, so a negative thing is actually positive, right?
Nice post, well written
PS, if you get time, could you read a post of mine, and if you like it, vote for it? I’d be really grateful
Thanks Achyuth!!
and yeah..your post Static is an awesome
Good one
Thanks Neeraj
“Once one of “sweet” friends … ”
I can kinda feel your emotions after seeing the minor spelling mistakes you made in this para. in the whole post you made mistake only here.it just shows your emotions are taking over the writer in you.
i heard that writing your worries or problems take a huge weight from you..so let it go…
Thanks man for finding it out..
That’s one of my problems..I have only one writing..I don’t review it after that..
So whatever flows out during that mood,that the POST!!
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